Another thing that would be great in a sequel is to ACTUALLY show the complete morning routine of every staff member as they get up and go to work.

This could be done during the movie's beginning credits and opening music, and would include things such as:

- Cpt. Peacock getting his red carnation that he wears on his jacket each day

- Miss Brahms leaving home and catching the bus

- Mr. Humphries' mother preparing his breakfast and lunch and seeing him off for the day

- Mr. Lucas waking up somewhere (after an entertaining night) and realizing he needs to head in to work

- Mrs. Slocombe caring for her cat before anything else

- Mr. Rumbold receiving an early morning call from Mr. Grace (again) who doesn't realize that Mr. Rumbold is at home in bed and not expected to be in the office for another three hours

After all the opening credits, the entire staff finally gets to the store, entering the small lobby at the same time at the bottom of the building and climbing into the lift together.

The lift travels slowly up to the department (this time on the third floor).

The lift slowly opens, where they are greeted by a grinning, smiling Mr Harmon.

The staff questions why he has such a big smile on his face, to which he merrily replies:

"Ladies and gents, it is in fact Saturday today - And I'm working overtime."

After a huge reaction from the staff, they climb back into the lift and head back down to the lobby.

(End of opening scene)

(Next scene)

The early morning phone call from Mr. Grace, as it turns out, plays directly into the first post from above.

Mr. Grace is somewhere in the bowels of the old building. He managed to find an old phone and called the only number he knew by heart (Mr. Rumbold's home) and ask him to come search for him, bringing along Mr. Harmon and any others he could manage as well.

This all occurred on a Saturday, and so after the staff mistakenly shows up to the department, they head back down to the Lobby only to run into Mr. Rumbold and find out about the situation.

Mr. Rumbold "commandeers" the staff to help and assures them there will be some kind of reward for finding where Mr. Grace ended up.

Mr. Grace, as it turns out, was supposed to meet a special "someone" in a remote part of the store, but somehow ended up breaking through to old tunnels from the original building and traversing deeper into old London passageways beneath the city.

(Next scene)

Mr. Harmon (as usual) brings Mr. Rumbold his morning coffee, telling him it's the "weekend version" and therefore was made with whatever coffee was leftover after the prior week.

Mr. Rumbold takes a small drink, makes a face and then hands it back to Mr. Harmon and says he'll wait until Monday instead.

Mr. Harmon: Right sir. I have Warwick and two others already searching the building and asking who was the last to see Mr. Grace. We've also made a phone call out to Mr. Grace's secretary but she hasn't come in yet.

Mr. Rumbold: Very well, I suppose I'll have to wake up the board members and let them know what's happening, even though it's Saturday.

Mr. Harmon: Oh don't worry sir, they already know. I already spoke with Mr. Theobald and he called the others.

Mr. Rumbold: How do you know their phone numbers??

Mr. Harmon: (Grinning) Well I do deliver all their morning tea........

(Knock on the door)

(Cpt. Peacock opens the door and sticks his head in)

Cpt. Peacock: We're outside, sir.

Mr. Rumbold: Once again, people who knock usually are. Come in.

The staff (and Mr. Harmon) all gather in front of Mr. Rumbold's desk, waiting for an update on the whole situation.

Mrs. Slocombe: What's this all about Mr. Rumbold? My pussy's not used to being alone on Saturday, and will need extra attention if not attended to soon.

Mr. Rumbold: I see. Well, this is what we know so far. Gather close everyone.

(Everyone squeezes closer to the desk)

Mr. Rumbold: It seems, Mr. Grace was supposed to meet with a potential interviewee last night at 10:30pm.

Mr. Lucas: (Laughing) at 10:30?? 

Miss Brahms: What sort of 'interview'?

Mr. Rumbold: A potential secretary, as far as I can sort out. They were supposed to meet in the service lift, but it's been having trouble going up and down.

Mrs. Slocombe: WHAT'S been having trouble going up and down?

Mr. Rumbold: The lift!

Mr. Harmon: It's on the maintenance list but Mr. Grace hasn't approved it yet.

Mr. Rumbold: Anyway, apparently he entered the lift, pressed the button and ended up somewhere below the ground floor....it stopped moving after that and Mr. Grace began walking around the basement floor, trying to find a way back up.

Mr. Harmon: Also, the lights are off down there as part of Mr. Grace's money-saving policy. We're waiting for the key from the electrician to turn them back on.

Cpt. Peacock: And where is he at?

Mr. Harmon: Last word was that he's slowly 'recovering' after a rather long social occasion last night. He's promised to get here as soon as possible but may need his wife to drive him in.

 

(Cpt. Peacock rolls eyes)

Mr. Humphries: So what exactly are we here for, then? I was supposed to go to a fancy dress party at the new roller-disco that just opened.

Mrs. Slocombe: Oh, you mean the one by the airport, that looked rather nice! Maybe me and Mrs. Axelbee will join you, she's been wanting get out and dance now that her ankle's healed...

Mr. Humprhies: Oh yes, in fact I can get us all a discount if my close friend is working there and......

Mr. Rumbold: (scoffing) I fear we may be straying from the point.....now, since we're all here and waiting I'm going to temporarily open the store and serve customers until we can get down to the basement again. I'll let you know of any further developments. Until then, places everyone!

(The staff (reluctantly) heads out of the office)

 

(Scene opens in the men's department)

(Mr. Lucas and Mr. Humphries are taking off their jackets to put them away and get ready for customers)

Mr. Lucas: You know, I can't see what opening the store is going to accomplish on a Saturday. What we really need is a sign outside saying that we're open.

Mr. Humphries: Well, think of it this way. If anyone does show up, it's because they're desperate to buy and we'll be guaranteed a commission.

(The lift doors ding and open - Mr. Grainger enters)

Mr. Grainger: Oh hello everyone, I just came in because I forgot I left my wallet on the counter.

(Mr. Humphries opens a drawer and quickly finds it, handing it to Mr. Grainger)

Mr. Humphries: There you are, Mr. Grainger.

(Mr. Grainger immediately heads back toward the lift, pretending not to notice everyone working)

Mr. Lucas: Uh, Mr. Grainger! We're open for business right now.

Mr. Grainger: Oh, well I promised Mrs. Grainger I'd meet her for breakfast.....so long everyone.

Mr. Lucas: Mr. Rumbold's promised us a large bonus for working today.

Mr. Grainger: Oh, well maybe I'll stay for just a bit.

(Mr. Grainger immediately comes back and starts taking off his coat)

(The lift doors bing and open again - A customer comes running in toward the men's department - He's dressed in a clown suit, shoes and wig)

Customer: I'm sorry, but I just saw that gentlemen (points at Mr. Grainger) walk into the store, are you open??

Mr. Humphries: Oh yes sir, we are. How can we help you?

Customer: Oh, thank goodness. I'm late for a friend's birthday party.

Mr. Humphries: We'd never have guessed....

Customer: It's his son's birthday and I'm supposed to entertain him. My joke handkerchief is too short, do you have half a dozen more I could use?

Mr. Lucas: Why certainly sir. Here, let me help you -

(Mr. Lucas proceeds to grab the handkerchief on the customer and begin pulling it out. He begins slowly, then goes faster as he realizes it somehow keeps going and going)

Mr. Lucas: My, you have got a lot of 'em in there, don't you?

(Mr. Lucas keeps pulling, now a large pile of tied handkerchiefs on the floor with more coming out)

Mr. Lucas: Does this actually end sir.....?

Customer: Wait a minute, how am I going to get all of those back in there before the party!?

Mr. Grainger: Mr. Lucas, gather all that up and take him in the fitting room and help him get sorted out.

Mr. Lucas: Yes, Mr. Grainger....

(Scene changes to lady's counter)

 

(Mrs. Slocombe taking off her jacket and handing it to Miss Brahms)

Mrs. Slocombe: So anyway, I told Mrs. Axelby that if she'd stop skiing in the junior olympics every year, maybe her ankle'd stop acting up.

Miss Brahms: I thought you said she'd retired from all that?

Mrs. Slocombe: Well, since she stopped playing professional football she needed something to fill the time...

Miss Brahms: I see....

Mrs. Slocombe: Anyway, Miss Brahms would you setup the center display stand?

Miss Brahms: But it's Saturday? Are you sure anyone's comin' in?

Mrs. Slocombe: Well, we can get a head start on next week and keep Grainger out of our nook.

Miss Brahms: What's a nook anyway?

Mrs. Slocombe: Grab the display unit, girl.

Miss Brahms: I thought Mr. Harmon's lot always brought it out.

Mrs. Slocombe: Well, it's just us today and we're just as good. Now you push and I'll pull.

(They get on either side of the display that's sitting in front of the counter, which still has a large sheet over it)

Mrs. Slocbome: Now, all together, let's go!

(The display unit jolts forward and Mrs. Slocombe falls back on her behind)

Mrs. Slocombe: Miss Brahms!! 

Miss Brahms: Oh, Mrs. Slocombe!

(Miss Brahms helps her up, Mrs. Slocombe wipes off her skirt)

Mrs. Slocombe: Take it easy, this time!

Miss. Brahms: Sorray.......

(They push a second time and make it to the center of the floor, where Mrs. Slocombe backs into Mr. Grainger who has been watching the whole time)

Mr. Grainger: And what exactly is this??

Miss Brahms: It's the new center display unit.

Mr. Grainger: I wasn't informed about this, Mr. Humphries did you know this was happening?

(Mr. Humphries comes center floor)

Mr. Humphries: No, Mr. Grainger, I'm as shocked as you are.

Mr. Grainger: And what exactly is it?

Miss Brahms: It's a mystery to us all.

Mrs. Slocombe: It's been authorized and approved BY ME.

(Mrs. Slocombe reaches up, grabs the large sheet covering the display and quickly pulls it off....)

(The whole staff is STUNNED as the sheet comes off to reveal the ACTUAL secretary that Mr. Grace was supposed to meet, dressed entirely in a bathing suit)

(The staff gasps as the secretary slowly stands up after sitting and being motionless for a long time)

Mr. Lucas (laughing): My word, these displays are getting more and more life-like aren't they!

Mr. Grainger (To Mrs. Slocombe): You approved this??

Mrs. Slocombe: Of course not! And who are you supposed to be???

Secretary: Je ne parle pas anglais....

Mr. Grainger (looking at Mrs. Slocombe): What did she say?

Mrs. Slocombe: I've no idea......

Mr. Humphries (rolling his eyes): She said she doesn't speak English. It's French.

Miss Brahms (also rolling eyes in jealousy): How exotic.......

(Cpt. Peacock walks across the floor to find out what's going on)

Secretary: Pouvez-vous m'aider?

Mr. Grainger: What did she say now?

Cpt. Peacock: She asked for some help. I'm sure I could provide some assistance seeing that I am familiar with the dialect.

Miss Brahms (folding arms): Oh yeah? What sort of assistance....?

Mrs. Slocombe (rolls eyes and exhales): Miss Brahms, take her into the fitting room immediately and get her dressed so she can see Mr. Rumbold.

Miss Brahms: Yes, Mrs. Slocombe.

(The whole staff watches (Especially Cpt. Peacock) as Mrs. Brahms and the french secretary go into the fitting room)

Cpt. Peacock: Well now, uh. Back to your places everyone! Mrs. Slocombe please inform me when the um, "secretary" is ready to see Mr. Rumbold.

(Mrs. Slocombe stares and shakes her head at Cpt. Peacock as he walks back across the floor)

(Mr. Rumbold's office - Mr. Rumbold is on the phone)

Mr. Rumbold: And now it seems that Mr. Grace's new secretary was on our floor the whole time, so that means Mr. Grace is down there alone.......no, I haven't spoken with her yet, I only know that she's French. Yes......yes.......alright I'll tell them Mr. Theobolt.

(Hangs up the phone in frustration - Suddenly there's knocking on the door)

Mr. Rumbold (scoffing and writing down notes): Yes, what it is??

(Mr. Harmon comes in)

Mr. Harmon: Sorry to interrupt, Mr. Rumbold. It seems the electrician is still waitin' for his wife to come and get 'em and drive him here. Warwick's got a little electrical experience but after Mr. Grace cut the health insurance he won't go near it anymore.

Mr. Rumbold: Fine, any luck finding an interpreter for the secretary?

Mr. Harmon: Well, I asked around and it seems Miss Comlozi from cosmetics knows 'nuff to get by. Fortunately, she's workin' today so she'll be up here in a minute.

Mr. Rumbold: Excellent. Mr. Theobolt is headed here now. It seems management wants to keep this quiet as long as possible and keep the authorities out unless absolutely necessary. For now, keep checking on the electrician and let me know IMMEDIATELY when he's headed in.

Mr. Harmon: Right sir.....

(Mr. Harmon starts to head out, when suddenly they both hear someone shouting "Hellloooo.......")

(Mr. Harmon turns around and Mr. Rumbold stands up)

Mr. Harmon: Did you hear that?

Mr. Rumbold: Of course!

Mr. Harmon looks at Mr. Rumbold's ears and smiles: Right sir.

Mr. Rumbold: Where did that come from??

(They both listen for a second, and again here "Hellloooo???")

(They both go over and kneel over a vent in the floor)

Mr. Rumbold (looks at Mr. Harmon, then yells): Hello??

Voice: Hello?

Mr. Rumbold: No, I said hello?

Voice: Well I said it first!

Mr. Rumbold: Who is this??

Voice: Is that you jugears??

Mr. Rumbold (scoffs): Yes, is this Mr. Grace??

Mr. Grace: Of course, it's rather dark down here but I saw some light coming from an old pipe so I started shouting into it.

Mr. Rumbold (shouting): It's good to hear you, Sir. Do you know where you are?

Mr. Grace: Yes, I'm down in the basement.

Mr. Rumbold: Yes, but where in the basement?

Mr. Grace: I didn't know we had more than one.

Mr. Harmon: We need to know what floor you got off at, sir.

Mr. Grace: I've haven't gotten off anything yet....

Mr. Harmon: When you got off the floor did you see the number 'bove the lift doors?

Mr. Grace: No, I forgot me glasses. Send someone down here fast and turn the bloody lights on.

Mr. Rumbold: We're working on that sir. For now I'm recommending you stay put where you're at. Do you understand?

Mr. Grace: Right. Send my secretary over to the vent when she arrives.

Mr. Rumbold: Right sir.....

Mr. Harmon: We'll get you out'a there a soon as possible Mr. Grace.

Mr. Grace: Of course....oh, and Mr. Rumbold, stop ordering opera tickets with management's account.  I heard that.

(Both stand up and Mr. Rumbold walks back to his desk)

Mr. Harmon (smiling): You was in here ordering opera tickets this morning while we was all scramblin' around??

Mr. Rumbold: Oh, go and find the electrician Mr. Harmon.

Mr. Harmon: Right sir.....

(End of scene)